Get Out of Work FreePass
by Weeble Wobble Chic
Summary: Zack will assure you that if convincing Sephiroth that Cloud is awesome means he gets out of work tomorrow,then he will have a free schedule.
1. EaSy As PiE

**Author's Notes**:This,my dears,is my first Final Fantasy fic.it's short,and kinda stupid, but I rather like it.Some boy love hints if you tilt your head to the left,squint through your right eye,and listen to My Humps on loop for an hour or two.

**Disclaimer**:FANfiction.

Begin.

"Ah, I can't wait til we're done here and and I can go see Cloud!" Zack beamed as he added a few papers to a large stack. Sephiroth glanced up at the glowing SOLDIER First Class,"I have yet to see what it is you find so..interesting about this cadet-"

"He's an adorable-"

"Annoying."

"midget-"

"Who's hair should be considered a weapon."

"with the cutest little-"

"Stubby."

"face and the biggest-"

"Girly."

"blue eyes EVER.Not to mention-"

"He stutters like there's no tomorrow."

"he's tough and-"

"Forgets to breathe sometimes."

"strong and-"

"Too weak to make it into Soldier."

"so adorably dark and broody, but-"

"A perfect target for practice."

"when he smiles it's like-"

"The world may end?"

"the world could stop right now and I'd be happy-"

"Because you have psychiatric problems.."

"because he's enjoying his life and-"

"probably about to end yours?"

"maybe there's hope for a better world someday when he'll always smile..."

"...Fine.I give...convince me that Cadet Strife is really worth all this..toil and I'll give you tomorrow off."

"...Seriously?"

Zack grinned as Sephiroth nodded and signed another document. Oh god,all he had to do was prove how amazing Cloud was and he'd get tomorrow off? Hot damn!Easy as pie,baby,easy as pie.

"Alrighty,deal.Follow me oh great and poweral General."Zack hopped out of his seat and practically skipped towards the door.Sephiroth followed at a much more languid pace and sighed.Was he going to regret this?..Well..with Zack,most likely.But really,cadet Strife?The boy was a dolt from what he had experienced.Too small for his age,and weak and sickly looking.Sometimes,when he came to speak to Zack,he'd find Strife there already and the boy would stop breathing! If he had some sort of asthmatic problem it should be in his charts,but so far he'd found nothing to indicate such.He shook his head and followed the First Class towards the cadet training grounds.

Upon arrival Zack hushed Sephiroth(who glared in response)and told him to watch from where he stood.Sephiroth followed Zack's finger and saw Cloud with his back turned to them staring down a buster sword that had been shoved pretty deep into a wooden target.Zack grinned and approached the boy,"Cloudster!"

Cloud turned curiously and eyed Zack with his (incredibly)big blue eyes,"Oh..hi Zack.What are you doing here?"

"Ah,just doing a task for the big mean head."

Cloud raised a confused eyebrow at the older boy,"Who-?"

"Sephiroth.Poor me.He loads so much work onto me! I can't survive like this Cloud,I just can't!He's working my bea-u-ti-ful little fingers down to stubs!Everyone will tease me-"

"Zack-"

"They'll call me Stubby McStubbums-"

"Zack.."

"And they're make me snap my fingers for them-"

"Zack-"

"But I won't be able to!Because I'll only have stubs for fingers and-"

"Zaaaaaack.."

"Everyone will laugh and I'll become Sephiroth's stubby fingered bitch." Dry sob.

"..."..Interesting response Cloud.

Sephiroth rubbed the bridge of his nose.Honestly,why did he keep that man around again?Must be the stubby fingers.

Zack grinned and leaned towards Cloud,ruffling his wild blonde hair.Oh,careful Zack,don't impale yourself.Sephiroth rolled his eyes in impatience,really wishing Zack would just prove himself wrong so he could go and force the man back to work.

"Anywho,whatcha doin' shorty?You think glaring at the sword is gonna make it come out or something?"Cloud glared sullenly at his friend and wrapped his hands around the handle of the sword,pulling as hard as he could.

"No.I've been trying to pull it out for at least an hour.Some SOLDIER decided it was Pick-On-Cloud day and shoved it in here."Another sharp tug.

Zack peered at the sword then glanced at Sephiroth's position and mouthed,"watch carefully."

"Want me to pull it out?"

"No.I can do it myself."Another,harder tug.

Zack rubbed his chin,"You sure,it's in there pretty deep..and..you're kinda-"

"Zack.."Tug.

"You know.."

"Don't."Harder tug.

"Small..and.."

"Stop." Tug.

"Girly..and.."

"If you don't-" Pull...pull..did it just move?

"Weak."

"Damnit Zack!What did I just-"WOAH.

"AHK!Watch that thing,kid!"

Sephiroth watched closely as Cloud managed to yank the buster out and almost hit Zack in the process.Almost.Darn.So far though,he had been surprised;the kid hadn't stuttered once,and his hair never stabbed Zack,and he was breathing properly,and now he had just pulled a sword that weighed at least 3 times his weight out of a thick chunk of wood and he had even managed to keep it off the ground for 5 seconds or so.Impressive.

Cloud stared down at the buster sword in awe.Woah,no way! It'd actually come out!He lifted his eyes to Zack and smiled the biggest brightest smile yet, a small chuckle escaping his throat as his brilliant eyes gleamed.Sephiroth stared,mouth slightly open..Wow.Oh look,he and Zack were doing that weird non breathing thing now..

Sephiroth's eyes met Zack's and he saw a small,but genuine smile in them,and everything was light,and beautiful,and full of bishy sparkles until Zack opened his mouth-

"See Seph,I told you."

Cloud's smile stopped and he noticed the General standing not even 20 feet away and something in his stomach decided to come visit his throat and everything stopped. And then he dropped the sword(on Zack's boot)and remembered to salute.

"G..General.S..Sir."Eyes lowered and back stiff and still barely breathing and now he was back to the stuttering and the general awkwardness Sephiroth was used to and he sighed.Well,he'd have to break Cadet Strife of that habit now that he knew what he was really like,wouldn't he?

"Evening,Cloud.I do hope you'll forgive me,but I'm afraid I'll have to steal Zack back now.I haven't quite gotten his fingers to that stubby perfection yet.I do appologize.Zack?"Sephiroth smiled a small,cool smile at the quickly red turning cadet and nodded for Zack to follow him.

Zack grinned and giving Cloud's hair one last ruffle trotted after the retreating general,leaving the little blonde to stare in awe and realize that General Sephiroth had been standing there since the stubby finger thing and he'd seen the sword thingy,and oh Bahamut..he'd just called him Cloud.Was it considered fainting or passing out when one dropped into unconciousness in a fit of complete bliss?

Nevertheless,Zack was indefinitely free tomorrow.

End.

**Author's End Note**: Well,that's that.I haven't submitted anything here in a long while,and I'm hoping you guys dig this little oneshot.Lemme know if you liked it and would like me to make this into a set of drabbles or something. Ciao.

-points to conveniently placed purple-bluey button-Go.Now. 3


	2. HaPpY hAlLoWeEn

**AUTHOR'S NOTE**: Tadar, I've decided to update this thing and give ya'll another drabble thinger. It's really not connected to the one before it, since they really don't effect eachother, but if you want to pretend the other one happened, then okie dokie. Anywho, this is in celebration of Halloween which is only 4 nights away(including tonight). Yay.

**DISCLAIMER**: F A N **FiCtIoN **.yar

* * *

"No." 

"Please?"

"No Zack."

"Come on, it'll be fun! You get to wear a pretty dress and your hair is perfect, and you're so pretty and you have AMAZING legs, and I-"

Blank stare.

"Not..that I have any actual proof that your legs are amazing or anything..I mean..it's..not like I peep or somethin'...yeah...you know I'll..just..go..ciao."

Blank stare.

"I am not pretty. I am a MAN."

* * *

"Heeeeey, Cloudster-" 

"No."

"..What?"

"Whatever it is you want, NO."

"Oh come on, you haven't even heard my proposition yet!"

"Zack, you don't make propositions, you make public humiliations."

"..so?"

"No."

"Oh come on! You'll get to wear a pretty dress and you're so adorable and pretty and PERFECT and it'd mean soo much to me if you'd just do this one thing for me and-"

"And no. In case you haven't noticed, I'm a boy."

"Oh trust me bud, I've noticed...hee. But come on Cloud, please? I'll...make it worth your while..."

"...promise? You gotta do whatever I want.."

"Mmhm."

Silence.

"Alright...I'll do it."

"Good choice bud."

**

* * *

.4 nights later. **

* * *

"Hot damn Cloudster. You look..amazing." 

"Shut up. You still owe me."

"Oh don't worry, your gonna get what you wanted, just you wait."

"I better."

"You will! Hey, look, there, see! Exactly like you wanted."

Gurgle.

"Hee. Hiii Sephy, looking wolfish tonight."

"Oh be quiet Zachary. I can't believe I let you talk me into this I-...oh..Strife,..akhem..hello. You..look..."

Blatant staring.

Gurgle.

"Right, well, Lil Red, Wolfy, I think we should be getting to that costume party now."

"Uh..right..good idea Zachary...shall we..Cloud?"

"Y..yeah!"

Much inner giggling.

Zack grinned as they walked into the Halloween banquet. His black and purple Cheshire cat tale swinging behind him as he followed Little Red Riding Hood and the Big Bad Wolf inside. Man, he was good.

**

* * *

****AUTHOR'S NOTE**: Yar. That sucked, lol. Oh well, I'm bored, so nyeh. It's just one drabble, I'll try and do better. I've got a few good ones for Holiday time coming up, but you gotta wait for those, hee. Anywho, sorry for the crap drabble, but ya wanna click the lil purply blue button pour moi? 

Please and thankums, darlings.


	3. On the First Day

**AUTHOR'S NOTE**: Yes. I will make on per day. For the next 24 days. I PROMISE this.

_Disclaimer_: I believe I was too young when this game came out to be the owner of it and it's characters, don't ya agree?

* * *

-_On the First Day of Christmas my true love gave to me_- 

"What...is it?"

Poke.

"It's a present."

"Alright...but what is it?"

"It's an egg."

"Why would you give me an egg?"

"Because giving people eggs is cool?"

"..."

Smile.

"What may I ask, is in the egg?"

"A thing."

"A thing..."

"Yes, a thing."

"...Zack."

"...-smile-."

"..You don't know do you."

"...no."

"Zaaaaack."

"I'm sure it's harmless! All you have to do is keep it warm and make sure not to drop it or...cook it, and you'll find out eventually, right?"

"We're not supposed to have pets, Zack!"

"It's not a pet, it's a living creature!"

"Oh god, just take it back!"

"No way!"

"Zack!"

"Cloud!"

"...I am NOT taking care of...whatever this is! Take. It. Back."

"No you meanie head!"

"Zack, what if it hatches while I'm sleeping and turns out to be some evil venomous thing that kills me in my sleep?!"

"Then I'll throw myself off a cliff and we can both go to the lifestream and have naughty man sechz because noone catches an STD in the lifestream!"

"..."

Grin.

"Hate you."

"Merry first day to you too, kiddo."

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE**:woot. 


	4. On the Second Day

**AUTHORS NOTE:** Second day!

_Dis_**CLAIM**er: yar.

* * *

-_On the Second day of Christmas my true love gave to me_- 

"Ho ho ho."

"What do you want, Zachary?"

"...ho ho ho."

"...Zachary?"

"I said, HO HO HO."

"..."

"..."

"...are you trying to impersonate Santa Claus?"

"...If I say yes, will you sit on my lap?"

"Not likely."

"Then no."

"So then you were merely calling me a 'ho'?"

"If I say yes, THEN will you sit on my lap?"

"Go away, Zachary."

"Aye, aye General."

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:** Oh ho, yes, that's it for this installment. I said I'd do one everyday until Christmas, but I never said how long each one would be. Hee. Tricky me, ey? 


End file.
